


the runout zone

by iwaoiks



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Hurt No Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:42:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23864704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iwaoiks/pseuds/iwaoiks
Summary: There are two things in this world that Hajime knows very, very well: the first is avalanches, and the destructive power they hold. The second is Oikawa Tooru.Well, Hajime thinks, the two might actually be one and the same.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 7
Kudos: 72





	the runout zone

Almost 90% of avalanches are caused by human beings. When Hajime looks at Oikawa, pushing himself up the highest, most dangerous slopes, he thinks he can believe it.

In their final year of junior high, Hajime does a school project on avalanches. Through his extensive research and adamant desire to get an A so he can shove it up Oikawa’s ass, Hajime learns that there are three parts to the path of destruction: the starting zone, the avalanche track, and the runout zone. Hajime nods almost sagely as he jots it all down, notes spread around him on his bedroom floor like snow and debris. Oikawa is sprawled in the smack middle of it all, having no regard for the rumpled papers under his body, or Hajime’s sanity. Hajime gets the A and kicks Oikawa’s ass with it.

In that same year, Oikawa has The Incident with Kageyama. Hajime thinks it occurs very much like an avalanche: he watches, from afar, as the ice under Oikawa’s skin begins to break, and Oikawa starts sliding down to ruin at speeds Hajime cannot hope to match. Hajime tries to stopper it, drags Oikawa home before his knee completely gives out, forces him to sleep and eat something that isn't volleyball, but Oikawa is getting further and further from his reach.

When Hajime steps in between him and Kageyama, Hajime thinks, _this is it_. This has to be it. The end of the avalanche track. Kageyama scurries away, and Hajime all but headbutts some sense into his best friend who bleeds upon impact. And when Oikawa says _all of a sudden I feel invincible,_ smiling for the first time in weeks, Hajime thinks, _finally_ , they’ve reached the runout zone. He lets out a breath of relief, glad there are no casualties.

What Hajime doesn’t realize is that he’s only human, after all, and his hands were not made to stop the onslaught of catastrophe, even if they fit perfectly against Oikawa’s hipbones.

It’s nearing midnight. This is the third time this week that Hajime finds himself on the familiar trek to Aoba Johsai High’s gymnasium, walking into the red zone of the natural disaster that is Oikawa Tooru. Hajime sighs, his breath swirling like mist. Winter has been unforgiving this year, harsh wind rattling against the walls of Hajime’s stomach. No matter how much Hajime eats and plays volleyball, builds his muscles and bundles against the winter wind, his insides feel cold and empty. He wonders if he’s caught a cold. Ever since Oikawa started falling back to ruin, Hajime has felt a strange pocket of silence build up from inside him. It weighs on him. It makes his skin feel like ice.

Their loss to Shiratorizawa at InterHigh had hit them hard, the blizzard seeming to blow through Oikawa the hardest. Their final high school games are nearing. Oikawa feels like a mountain summit, out of reach and dangerously lonely, while Hajime feels sluggish like he's been trapped in the aftermath of an avalanche, confined by mounds of snow. No matter what any of them does, Oikawa to win and Hajime to keep Oikawa's head above water, it never seems enough. Sometimes, Hajime thinks Oikawa has never stopped tumbling down that mountain slope, ever since they were 14 — that he's still on the avalanche track, and the runout zone will only appear once Oikawa’s buried too deep.

Hajime lets out a shaky breath. 

By the time Hajime reaches the gym, the quiet in him feels almost deafening. Oikawa is standing on one end of the court, and even from this distance Hajime can see him panting heavily against the ball held in his hands. His shirt is almost soaked through, but the fire in his eyes remains burning, blazing, despite the tired lines framing them. Hajime feels the wind howl inside him, echoing through all that empty space. He swallows thickly. Then he makes his way to where Oikawa stands.

When he’s close enough, Hajime waits for Oikawa to land firmly on the ground first, before opening his mouth to scold him. Before he can say anything, however, Oikawa cuts in. “Go away, Iwa-chan,” he says, his voice a contrast from the way his eyes burn; Hajime wonders if it’s possible for him to get frostbite from Oikawa’s cold alone.

The words hit him harder than any snowfall or winter wind. Oikawa doesn’t even look at him as he says it, hasn’t looked at him once since he’d arrived, eyes trained to the other side of the court, to the opponent on the horizon that awaits him. Almost like Hajime doesn’t exist. Almost like Hajime isn’t there at all.

Oikawa tosses the ball in his hand high, high up, and Hajime watches as he makes his approach and soars, arms like wings in the air, carrying him places Hajime isn’t sure he’s meant to follow. When his hand meets the ball with a resounding slam, Hajime sees the skin of his palm red and blistered, a serve or two away from bleeding. The sight causes bile to rise up in his throat.

Oikawa lands and Hajime catches the slight wince, the way his eyebrows scrunch together in pain. His knee must be hurting, Hajime thinks. But Oikawa pays it no mind and turns to pick up another volleyball, and Hajime feels the ice under his skin break.

He wonders, sometimes, what happens after an avalanche, once it reaches the runout zone. It's probably time to look for casualties, he thinks, to sift through the debris. Hajime wants to tell Oikawa to stop, but his limbs feel heavy, his heart feels heavy, like he’s snowed in and losing all feeling from the cold. He wants to scold Oikawa, but he doesn’t feel like speaking at all. Actually, he kind of just wants to go home. He kind of just wants to go to sleep.

Hajime lets out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. After the snow settles, is it quiet, he wonders. Is it empty? Hajime takes in another breath, slowly, feeling the backs of his eyes sting. His chest feels oddly hollow. This must be the runout zone, he thinks, but he’s the only one caught under piles of snow.

Oikawa seems to only take notice of him then, and distantly Hajime wonders if the silence is deafening to him, too. Oikawa looks at him, eyebrows furrowed in annoyance, and then something in his eyes shifts — like he’s seeing Hajime for the first time since 14, tired and heavy and empty. Oikawa frowns worriedly.

“Iwa-chan—” he starts, letting go of the ball in his hands and taking a step towards him. His fingers reach out, but — Hajime recoils. Oikawa’s hands falter in the air between them. Hajime shakes his head, trying to remind himself to breathe.

“Iwa-chan...?”

He’s so cold. His chest feels too empty, like if someone knocked on his heart the sound would surely echo. Hajime lets out a trembling breath. He shakes his head again.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Hajime says, quiet, and when their gazes meet, he watches Oikawa crack like ice sheets on a summit. Hajime doesn’t have the strength to chase him any longer. “I just can’t, Tooru.”

Hajime turns away and leaves.

**Author's Note:**

> hugeeeee thanks to [moony](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pulsingblues) for letting me scream about this idea, whacking my head and telling me to make this a drabble, and then being my beta. you are my saviour <3 everyone go read moony's fics!!
> 
> my twitter is @[iwaoiks](https://twitter.com/iwaoiks)!


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